Celebrate or Mourn?

If you’ve lost someone you held near to your heart, you will inevitably be faced with the decision of how to mark the anniversary of their death. Do you celebrate their life or mourn their absence? It’s a deeply personal decision and one of those times when you truly need to follow your gut.

I admire the people who are able to make it a celebration. Those who go out and do something that marks the date in a positive way and makes them feel good and happy. Because we all know that those people we have loved would not want to be responsible for us feeling sad.

Unfortunately, sad is exactly how I feel each year when the dreaded day approaches. Each year, I hope it will be different and that I can turn this thing around. But the reality is… my heart is still broken. And the “anniversary” seems to rip open all the healing I have been working on.

This year, I decided to stop berating myself for feeling so awful. Instead, I leaned right into the pain and let it all out. And somehow, that made me feel better. I acknowledged how much I missed her and how lucky I was to have had her. Cue the ugly tears. And then, I moved along and got back to the business of living.

Whatever you decide – celebration or mourning – be comfortable in the decision you make and honor the person’s memory in a way that feels right to you.